We get it. It makes perfect sense to us. We encourage it. Our family and friends wish we wouldn't do it. They don't understand. "Just let it go" they tell us. We can't. We won't. We will always do what is best for our children. Yesterday, without telling a single family member, (as history tells us all they will do is discourage) we had a wonderful meeting with Gabi's birthmother, Nicole, or "Cole" as Gabi has lovingly dubbed her. 
It was our second time meeting her, we met her in May on birthmothers day at a celebration. This was different. This was one-on-one in the privacy of the conference room at Adoption STAR. She brought the twins, Emily and David, who are 1.5 years younger than Gabi. She also brought Ashley who is 10, and Erica who is 8. Gabi has met the older girls quite a bit on visits with their grandmother, so they were old friends coming together to laugh and play. Naively unaware of the blood that flows in common among them.
And it made sense. There will be no (or hopefully fewer) questions of "Who" or "What" or "Why" in our future. Only "When" as in "Mommy, when can we see them again?"
2 comments:
It can be challenging, especially when friends and family are less than supportive. But you are doing the right thing encouraging visits and contact. No doubt Gabi will thank you for it someday!
I have been struggling this last week with the degree of openness in our arrangement but I'm trying to remember that the RIGHT thing isn't always the EASY thing.... Hugs to you. Alyssa
Teri-
You and Howie are such strong people. Gabi will so appreciate all your efforts when she is older. I know Cole does also. Gabi is one lucky little girl!
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